Common Child Bad Habits

• Nose picking: Parents find this child bad habit one of the most annoying mostly because of the risk of transmitting germs, and also because it is socially frowned upon. It could begin because of encrusting inside the nose due to a cold, and then become a habit. When children pick their nose and put their fingers in their mouth or eyes, or touch other children, infections can be passed on. Dirty or sharp fingernails can irritate the sensitive lining of the nose and create bleeding or oozing cuts inside the nose.

• Sucking thumbs and fingers: Children indulge in sucking their thumbs and fingers when they need comfort. While most outgrow this form of child bad behavior, it can last for some others till past five years of age. This habit should be discouraged because it can cause teeth to grow unevenly or create speech defects. The child bad habit can extend from thumbs or fingers to objects like pacifiers, blankets, or favorite toys.

• Teeth grinding: Bruxism, or grinding teeth is a common child bad habit. Usually infants grind or clench their teeth when milk or permanent teeth are pushing through the gums or in their sleep. Children who grind their teeth at other times are likely to let this develop into a bad habit. This form of child bad behavior can cause defects in the teeth or in the jaw joints and should be stopped.

• Nail biting: Biting nails could be caused by many factors, but the concern is that dirt and bacteria lodged under nails is transferred directly into the mouth through this child bad behavior. It could also lead to infected or bleeding cuticles that are very painful. Some of the same methods used to stop the bad habit of thumb sucking can be used to stop nail biting – using bitter liquid on fingernails, distracting the child when he or she is biting nails, and providing an activity to keep hands busy.

• Holding breath: Children hold their breath because sometimes they feel it is the only thing they can control. It could carry on for enough time that they lose consciousness. This child bad behavior can be the most frightening for parents. It is best to consult a doctor when this happens, to rule out medical complications that have caused this.

• Touching genitals or masturbation: Children explore all parts of their bodies and are fascinated by their own discoveries. It is a natural urge to explore their own genitalia as much as exploring their own hands and face. When children explore their genitals it gives them pleasure, causing them to repeat the child bad habit again. They do not realize the sexual connotations of this behavior but can cause a great deal of embarrassment to the parents.

Children enjoy any kind of attention and if a bad habit brings them parental attention even in the form of reprimand, they will repeat this child bad habit. It takes patience, understanding and creativity to help a child give up a bad habit.

References:

1. Bad Habits/ Annoying Behavior – University of Michigan Health System
2. Hair Pulling, Head Banging and Other Bad Habits – Keep Kids Healthy

Why Organize A Kid Date?

Play dates are essential because:

• They help in the moral and social development of the child by involving him in play date games.
• They offer a special kids date time that your child will always remember.
• They help a child make new friends through a play day.

Organizing A Play Day – Getting Started

The first step in organizing a play date for your child is to get together other children he/she can play with. If you already know some parents, inviting their children for a kid date should be no hassle. Otherwise, to organize a kid date you may even place an advertisement in a local newspaper, but be sure to conduct some background checks on these families who approach you for a playdate.

Essential Elements For A Play Day

While organizing a play date at home, two things are absolutely indispensable. Make sure you have plenty of toys and good food to eat for a successful play date. Some prior play date games planning will stand you in good stead and keep the children occupied continuously. It is advisable to organize a playdate with a few children. Otherwise the kid date will result in chaos. Finally, lay ground rules at the beginning of the play date and make sure they are followed.

Play Date Games Suggestions

Some of these play date games may be played to help your child socialize with others.

• Cooking a simple snack item can be an interesting way to spend a kids date. Baking cookies or making popcorn keeps the children engaged and gives them the thrill of learning to make something they eat.
• A board game is also one of the popular play date games.
• Toys that the children can play with and share among each other can also be used in a play date.
• Dressing up is another good play date games one can try out.

Duration Of A Play Day

It is advisable to keep a playdate short- not more than a few hours as children get tired easily.

An Interesting Play Day

Once your child is comfortable with the play date companion and parents of all children know each other well, a playdate may even be organized in a park, zoo or family restaurant. Each setting will have different things to teach the kid date friends and innovative play date games may be tried out here.

With parents getting busier by the day, organizing a play date is getting more and more difficult. However, play date games are not only essential for your child’s healthy growth; they also allow parents some time to relax by sharing responsibilities among themselves.

Single Parent Households

Children of single parents are susceptible to psychological issues, emotional problems and social difficulties, and need the extra attention and care to help them cope with their situation. Single parents need to offer emotional care and nurturing, traditionally seen as the mother’s role, as well as being the discipliner and provider for the child, usually mantles that the father takes on. In addition to child care and upbringing, single parents juggle the demands of a job, social pressures, and a personal life. When the stress levels increase as they so often do, members of single parent homes can develop problematic relationships, leading to further estrangement and isolation for children.

Being a Single Parent – Making New Rules

In single parent households, every day can be a challenge. It takes effort and reflection to help make life in a single parent home easier for everyone involved. Rules and routines that once worked need to be reconsidered and changed to suit the new situation. Some basic rules:

• Children of divorced or widowed parents will need to be counseled separately for their own issues. Parents must understand that each child reacts differently and should not presume that the success formula of another single parent will work in their own case.
• At the time of change, most children are likely to want to help if they are old enough. Allocating some of the household responsibilities not only lifts some of the burden off the shoulders of a single parent, but makes the child feel useful and gives purpose. Put your child in charge of safe tasks like doing the laundry or laying the tables for meal times, or other age-appropriate tasks. Allowing older siblings to help in morning routines or bedtime routines makes them feel like they are making a contribution and helps them develop responsibility.
• Switching between the caring parent and the disciplining parent can be confusing for both a single parent and for the child. When a parent confronts a child for misbehaviour, keeping it firm and matter-of-fact will work better than using emotional outburst. However, single parents should remember that a lot of unruly behavior is often a cry for attention or a deeper emotional problem and treat it as such.
• Another reason to create new routines at home is that the old habits could have painful associations for both children and parents, especially in the case of death. Introducing new family traditions while keeping those that are precious and familiar is another way to ease the transition from a double-parent family to a single parent home.

Single parent families often have to consider the welfare of their children before their own, and doing so repeatedly can lead to resentment and anger. Counselling and professional help can work just because they offer someone that a parent can talk to, and single parent groups often provide help and advice. Most importantly, explore your rights and options as single parents to make sure you are utilising every resource at your disposal. Being a single parent is not easy, but a few sensible choices can make it rewarding and lead to deeper bonding and new experiences.

Reference:

1. Single Parent Tips – Life Tips

A common problem faced by single parent households is a lack of a role model for children. While most children grow up observing the interaction between two parents and learning about healthy social responsibilities or relationships, single parent families need to be creative about this. Trusted relatives and close family friends often offer a chance for children to observe and learn through interaction.

Single Parent Families – Creating a Work-Life Balance

While a job can suddenly become critical when there is only one income to support the home, single parents will have to deal with increased demands and less time for themselves. Creating a more appropriate work-life balance involves some restructuring of professional lives for working parents.

• Talk to your current employer about working more flexible hours so that you can be there for your children when they are home from school. If it means finding a job that allows you this freedom, it might be worthwhile considering shifting to a new workplace. Volunteering for childcare at a center often solves both the problem of employment and of spending time with your child.
• On weekends, make sure to plan activities that allow for some quality time together. In addition to providing fun and distraction, activities are a good time to talk to children in a relaxed atmosphere about problems or issues.
• Explore options to earn and stay home if your job allows it. Telecommuting or working from home for your office is allowed by many offices now. Alternatively, setting up a home-based business or working freelance are also ideas that can be considered.

Emotional Support for Single Parents and Children

Single parent families are often closer knit because of a sense of camaraderie, or a feeling of us-against-all-problems between parents and children. Single parents often find it helps to treat their family as a team, whether there is one child or four. This provides a structure for the family to rely upon, and offers a chance at delegating responsibilities and choosing ‘leaders’ – concepts that children learn from an early age in the playground.

In the midst of worrying about their children and their jobs, single parents should set aside some time for themselves. Meditation, yoga, morning jogs, long baths, or just some alone time at home while the kids are being looked after by family or friends – anything that helps single parents to unwind and relax will help.

Being a single parent doesn’t have to be lonely. Support groups and single parent meetings offer a chance to socialize with other parents who are in similar situations. These groups may also offer services like baby-sitting, playgroups or outings for children. Dating is another option to explore, and once single parents feel ready, these groups provide chances to meet other people who understand the restrictions and joys of single parenthood.

Taking Childcare for Granted

While child carers naturally develop a bond with the children they care for, it is still a job for them. When parents take it for granted that the child carer will look after the child even after center hours, or on holidays, they are not respecting the childcare professional. If a childcare center is willing to perform these kind of duties, parents should be willing to pay for the extra time of the employees of the center.

Payments of Childcare Bills

Treating childcare centers like babysitters is a mistake many parents make. The center is a business, and must collect payments in time to meet other overheads and costs, as well as pay salaries. When employees are not happy, it affects the children at the center, so make sure you make your payments in time.

Childcare and Housekeeping Duties

Children can be messy and need to be looked after. During learning games and constructive play, children often end up with soiled clothes and shoes. However, child carers cannot be expected to rinse mud and paint stains off clothes and send back clean lunch-boxes. In addition, parents should teach children to behave the same at the childcare center as they would in their own house; i.e no littering, flushing the toilet after use, etc.

Childcare and Parents

There are some lines between child care providers and parents that should not be crossed. Child carers may be very familiar with a child and family; this does not allow parents to make payments late, to involve child carers in family disputes, or ask for babysitting favors.

Open Communication and Childcare

It is most important for parents and child care providers to develop a stream of communication in which both sides understand and respect the needs of the other. Making unreasonable demands is not excusable. Parents need to keep in mind that there are other children at the center and the providers will do their best to provide care as good as home care.

Also, childcare centers take time to create and distribute brochures, pamphlets and rule books, as well as design contracts that care for the best interests of the family, the child and the center. Parents will be expected to read these contracts carefully before agreeing to anything.

Childcare Expectations

Parents need to talk to child care professionals before signing up for their services so that they reach a full understanding of the discipline methods and principles followed by the center. A childcare provider will have to control unruly behavior in children, and parents should discuss the methods of discipline.  Specifications about health problems, allergies and special instructions need to be discussed at this point to understand if the center is able to provide this.

Parents cannot expect unreasonable services such as not allowing children to mingle with certain other children, or particular religious training. There may be other child care centers that cater to these requirements as part of their profile, and parents should consider these centers instead.

Being Asked to Leave Childcare: Reasons

While it may not always be the best way to handle a problem, asking a child to leave childcare is sometimes the only option a center has. Childcare centers are answerable to other parents and have bills to pay, and a disruptive or violent child or a parent who takes advantage of the system can prove to be a liability for them. A childcare center is within its legal rights to dismiss or ask a child to leave for those reasons. Some such reasons for asking a child to leave childcare are:

Problems with the child

• If the child is violent, abusive, unruly, and destructive or bullies other children for no reason, it can be a source of trouble for others in the group
• In an academically active center, below-average performance and failure to participate can hinder the progress of the class

Problems with the parents

• Parents who demand special treatment or exclusive privileges for a child that are difficult to accommodate within a group could be asked to leave childcare there and find a more suitable center
• Parents who are casual about pick-up and drop-off times or paying fees on a regular basis are viewed as unable to respect the professionalism of the center and may be asked to leave childcare
• Parents who are rude or disrespectful to the caregivers at the center may be asked to leave childcare

Leaving Childcare – Parents’ Tips on Handling a Child

When asked to leave childcare, parents can feel helpless and insecure about their daily routine. It is important to deal with the situation in a manner that your child is not affected or traumatized. Being asked to leave childcare is usually a last resort after warnings have been given before. Dealing with the problem when the first warning signs appear is the best way to avoid a situation in which nobody benefits. However, once asked to leave childcare, parents need to follow some basic steps to ensure the transition is smooth.
1. Understand the reason for being asked to leave childcare. A problem lies in the child’s behavior, not in the child. Children can often act up if they feel insecure, if there are changes at home or at the center that they are uncomfortable with, when scared or ill, or when there is an underlying mental health or developmental problem. Problem behavior as a reaction to one of these causes can be solved if the cause is addressed.
2. Talk to your child about leaving the center. Assure the child that he/she is not being rejected or abandoned, and discover what reaction the child is undergoing.
3. If the child was not the problem, its time to seriously rethink your own behavior. Treating a daycare center as a babysitter is not an option, especially because it frees your time for other work or chores. A childcare center is run by professionals and they should be treated that way. Disrespecting their requirements or the caregivers puts you and your child in a situation that leaves you both worried and upset.
4. Finding a new daycare center is important so that a pattern and routine can be established as soon as possible. In many cases, a child is asked to leave a daycare center if the philosophy of the parents and the center do not match. Look for a center where there is a meshing of principles or methods this time. When assessing a daycare center for potential admission, consider the kind of problems that were faced previously, and check if these are likely to arise here.

References
1. Childcare Expulsion Prevention Program; Early Childhood Michigan
2. Acting Up, Acting Out: When Young Children Are Put Out of Programs: Childcare Aware
3. Challenging Behavior: Child Welfare League of America

Choosing the Right Kind of Care for Disabled Children

Before settling on a professional, consider the options for care for special needs children.

• Child minders provide care for disabled children in their (child minder’s) own homes, while nannies will care for the child in the child’s own home. While childminders may have specific timings, many can work with flexible timings, depending on the schedule of the child’s parents and the number of children allowed for one child minder to manage at a time.
• Nannies are usually more flexible in their timings, and can provide care for disabled children in the comfort of a familiar home and surroundings.
• Day care centers and pre-school nurseries provide care for disabled children up to five years of age for a few hours a day and some offer all-day child minding services.

Care for Special Needs Children – Parents’ Tips

1. Qualification of child minder: The first factor to consider is qualifications and registration when it comes to finding child care for special needs children. With registrations, child care professionals go through tests and checks to ensure that they are suitable to be with children, that they work with parents to provide service in the best interest of the child, and that they create an atmosphere that is conducive for happiness, learning and safety.
2. Interview with child minder: Set aside time when trying to find care for special needs children to talk to the professional you are considering, and treat this as an interview. Explain your child’s needs in full, and ask about facilities and activities for children. When discussing your requirements with the potential child minder, remember that you know your child best and understand what he or she needs; you need to communicate what you want from care for your special needs child.
3. Childcare setting: The best way to recognize whether a child minder will provide the best care for your special needs child is to visit them in their homes. If other children seem happy and well-cared for, if there is enough space for learning games and creative stimulus, then the child minder is likely to be good at the job. Other co-workers there should seem happy and caring as well.
4. Other commitments: When deciding on a form of care for disabled children, parents need to consider regular medical or therapy appointments as well, and whether the childcare provider will be able to take the child to these sessions.
5. Appropriate care for disabled children: Finding childcare for disabled children is not only about the child minder. Observe the age- and ability-appropriateness of the activities to understand if your child will fit in and be happy.
6. Medical requirements: If your child has medical needs or treatment, the child minder should be able to administer treatment correctly and efficiently. For many parents, a child minder should have experience in caring for special needs children with the same condition, and this is a valid preference, especially if the disability is severe.

Care for disabled children requires training, experience, patience and understanding, but a certified professional will be more likely to help your special needs child develop and grow.

References :

1. Child care options. National Childminding Association
2. Registered and approved childminders. Parent’s Centre
4. Childcare for disabled children. Direct Gov UK

Constructive Play Today

Early childhood play today has changed in scope and scale, involving more advanced toys and games, but also edging out group playing and personal interaction. Learning games for children have been replaced by gaming and television that allow them to keep busy on their own, thereby reducing the development of social skills. Violence in early childhood play is a huge concern for parents today, as well as the growing popularity of sedentary games that has led to obesity in children.

Constructive play has taken a back seat with technology and electronics growing more popular now. With double-income families, parents and caregivers have less time to spend with their children and are likely to leave them watching the television. However, early childhood play allows a chance to introduce children to learning games and constructive play that help in the long run.

Learning Games for Children

Constructive play is different from the everyday play that children indulge in because it has a goal of teaching the child a new skill or concept, or of honing abilities. Abilities such as spatial skills, and concepts of size, weight, height, distance are made easier to comprehend when learned through play. Constructive play gives children a chance to improve their problem-solving skills, sharing skills, their motor skills and to learn more about themselves and the world around them. Some of the most effective learning games for children are inexpensive and use items found around the house. Important points for parents or caregivers to remember are:

• Play should be safe and non-violent
• Learning games for children should encourage participation, not elimination
• Children should be asked to use their imaginations and creativity in constructive play

Early Childhood Games

Some suggestions for constructive play or learning games for children:

1. Build cubby holes or secret homes by draping tables with blankets or sheets. Children could decorate them as a haunted house, a school, a hospital for their stuffed toys, or a wigwam

2. Painting and coloring of household waste like cardboard cartons, egg trays, tubes, plastic tubs, etc.

3. Outdoor activities like helping with gardening, building rock gardens, bird trays

4. Cutting and pasting colored paper and foil or fabric to make collages

5. Playing with animals, going for walks on beaches or in parks

Role of Adults in Early Childhood Play

During early childhood play, apart from ensuring that children are safe, adults have a significant role to play. Parents and caregivers can provide a variety of toys and instruments for learning games for children. A suggestion or a question from parents or caregivers can lead the child to question his/her own understanding and come up with imaginative solutions also. Dealing with disputes and encouraging participation are areas in which adults can help simple early childhood play turn into constructive play.

References :

1. Constructive Play. Govt of Western Australia
2. Constructive Play. Ministry of Education, NZ
3. Role of Play in Children’s Learning. Open Learn.

Many of us worry about our teenagers and what they are getting up to, for sadly in today’s world there are many problems teenagers can encounter when just hanging out on the streets. Younger teenagers can feel peer pressure from older ones and will often be led into crime, smoking, drinking and sometimes even drugs. So what options are open to parents with teenage children to help keep them off the streets and out of trouble?

Youth clubs

Most towns or local estates will have a youth club, these are generally run by volunteers who are often parents themselves who will provide a few hours of entertainment and a place for your teenager to go perhaps two or three times a week.

If you are lucky some clubs will open every night, clubs will have equipment such as TV’s and video recorders where your child can watch a movie and some will offer various team sports in which your child can take part in.

Most youth clubs will have a snack bar for your child to purchase soft drinks and snacks and clubs such as these will normally charge a minimal fee to help towards costs.

If the youth club is run by your local council then these will usually work out dearer and you may have to book your child in, in advance. Council run clubs will usually offer a wider range of activities and sometimes trips to leisure centers and they often have a sports team such as a football team or badminton team.

Youth clubs are generally open from about 6.00pm to 9.30pm and your child will have to make their own way to club and back home in most cases if you can’t take them and bring them back yourself. Some youth clubs will take any child from the age of 11 to 16, others will split children into different age groups over different nights.

Skateboard and Bike parks

Due to the increasingly popularity in skateboarding and biking, some councils have built skateboard and bike specific parks, these are specially designed areas where your child can go and meet with other children and ride in safety without endangering themselves or annoying other people.

Some are small and cheap and built on nothing more than rough land while others are more elaborate and costlier and will feature such obstacles as ramps and jumps. Children usually have to pay to use these facilities and they will be open for a few hours after school, the children will have someone to supervise them and make sure of their safety and the parks are inspected to meet safety standards.

Some parks of this type are open all year round but some only during the summer months, during school holiday times and weekends the parks are often open all day and are available to use on an hourly or two hourly basis.

Sports clubs and activities provided by school

Most junior schools now provide after school clubs in some form or other, these clubs are run by the teachers and will be run in school. These are usually split into various activities such as music lessons, art and crafts, reading clubs, chess clubs and drama.

Outside activities such as football, rugby and basketball are also generally offered for the sport oriented child. The clubs will usually last for roughly 1 and ½ to 2 hours and will not cost the parent anything.

Schools will often have team sports such as football or basketball and children will play in a league with other schools and train on certain nights of the week for a couple of hours. If your child is in such a team and they are playing away at another school then the parent is often invited to attend the match and give support.

For you it brings peace of mind knowing that your child is taken care of in between the hours of school ending and you returning home and for your child such as improved sports, academics and social skills.

There are several alternatives available for after school care and here are some thoughts to consider when deciding which option is right for you and your child.

School after care clubs

Many schools now offer after care clubs for children whose parents work, many of them are run by parents who volunteer their services or by teachers who help out and take turns providing activities for your child.

This is a practical and simple alternative as the club will usually be held on the school premises or perhaps in the school’s sports hall or youth club facilities, this way there is no extra cost or worry about your child getting to the center.

A lot of school after care clubs will provide various activities for the children including games, music, origami and art lessons, several of them also play team sports including football, basketball, baseball and track running.

They will usually provide snacks and drinks for children by way of a snack bar and this type of club is usually paid for on a weekly basis and the cost is reasonable. Another benefit is that your child will be around other children they know from within the school.

Local day care centers

Many day care centers will offer a pick up service and after school care clubs, several of them offer special after school care club buildings which are separate from the main day care center. This type of after school care will usually provide your child with age appropriate activities and snacks and drinks are generally available too.

Some centers may even have computers which the children can use to assist them in their homework and offer such things as football, basketball and other sports training.

The only problem is how your child gets there, if the after care center do a pick up service where your child is at a designated pick up point at a certain time this causes less worry, the pick up point is usually just outside the school premises. If your child is expected to get their on his/her own then you have the worry of them arriving safely.

Neighbors and friends

Often your neighbors and friends will have children the same age as your child and parents who don’t work will sometimes be willing to pick up your child when they pick up their own and take them home with them until you return.

Sometimes this is done on a rotation basis with several parents being involved, depending on the parents schedule this can be an excellent system providing parents work together, usually they provide a snack and drink and your child can watch TV or play a video game or make a start on his/her homework. The benefits are your child is with someone he/she knows and trusts and is with friends.

Nannies and child minders

A nanny or child minder will sometimes offer a service for taking care of children after school hours though this is usually for younger children in nursery and infant schools, but occasionally they will take older children.

The nanny or child minder will pick up your child after school at a designated point if they are older and take them to their home or your own home depending on the service agreed upon. Children will be offered drinks and snacks and age appropriate activities should be made available for your child, often the child minder or nanny will be able to give assistance with homework or projects.

The downside is that your child won’t be in the company of other children the same age and if activities aren’t provided to stimulate them they will quickly become bored.

Whichever option you choose to take it is essential that your child feels safe and secure after school and he/she knows exactly what they are expected to do and who is picking them up and also where any designated pick up points are.

It is also essential that your child knows what to do in the case of an emergency, say for example the bus or car that takes them to the after care club doesn’t show up or is late. The after care choice you make should also know of any problems your child has and if they have to take any medication.