Readiness for Easy Potty Training

For easy potty training, watch for signs of curiosity in your child when siblings or family members go to the bathroom. If your toddler is aware of bowel movements, can notify you by body language or sounds, or tells you about soiled nappies, it shows an increasing amount of control and understanding about this bodily function. Also, if your child remains dry or needs to use the toilet at regular timings, it shows a level of control. This is the right time to begin using potty training methods.

Tips on Potty Training

Before you begin, it is a good idea to introduce your child gradually to the idea of sitting on a potty, and other potty training methods. Allow toddlers to be in the bathroom when you are using it, teach them how to flush, let them watch the flush work, encourage and answer questions about the process of elimination: these are all effective tips on potty training and will help to introduce them to the concept of potty usage. Allow your child to select his or her own potty if possible, and let them know it is theirs to use.

Potty Training for Toddlers

Children may be apprehensive about what exactly they are supposed to do on the potty. Explain in detail what the potty is used for, or use feces from a dirty diaper to demonstrate it by placing it in the potty first and then disposing of it in the toilet. Potty training for toddlers can be confusing and stressful, especially if it becomes a source of disciplining and scolding. Reinforce the idea that using a potty is a grown-up activity, but do not insist on your child sitting on the potty if they don’t want to.

Other tips on potty training include: Let them sit on the potty fully clothed at first if they want, to get comfortable on it. At first, children using a potty may take a long time to complete a bowel movement because it is a new feeling. It helps to add fun to potty training for toddlers, by talking to them, encouraging them, or distracting them with a story or nursery rhyme when they are on the potty.

Potty Training Accidents

Even with excellent potty training methods, children are still likely to have ‘accidents’. Make it a point not to scold or show disappointment to children who have soiled their clothes. Deal with it in a cheerful manner and praise them when they successfully use the potty next time. Bear in mind that children may not be able to control their elimination at night and may still have to wear a diaper. Placing a child on the potty last thing at night and restricting water for an hour before bed-time will lead to dry diapers in the morning fairly soon after they are potty trained.

Things to remember before beginning potty training for toddlers: It is important to remember not to introduce potty training methods during times of stress or illness for a child. This could be anything from a disruption in routine, family problems, new babies or moving house, to any other change that seems to be causing some amount of adjustment issues or stress. Children usually take between 3-6 months to learn how to use a potty regularly, but it varies, and parents must watch children for signs of readiness.

References:

1. Toilet Teaching Your Child – Kids Health

2. Toilet Training Your Child – Family Doctor

3. Toilet Training – BBC UK

• Talk to your teen first: Teenagers tend not to share their lives with their parents as much as when they were children and depressed teens will be even more reluctant. Setting aside a time to talk to your teen in an affectionate, non-confrontational manner is important. Refrain from suggesting depression; instead mention the behavioral changes you have noticed and explain why it is worrying for you. Listen to their answers without judgment or without trying to offer advice. This may be easier said than done, since teenagers, especially depressed teens, do not like to be questioned or to share their lives with parents. However, it is important you let them know you are there for them and will try to support them as much as possible.

• Avoid giving advice or counseling: When a teen talks about teenage depression symptoms, acknowledge their feelings. Trying to talk them out of it or make them look on the brighter side is not likely to work, and will make them feel you are treating them like children. Acknowledging their confusion or pain, encouraging them to talk and refraining from offering advice is most helpful, and will ensure that the depressed teen feels safe and comfortable.

• Getting medical help: When depressed teens deny symptoms or cannot explain his or her strange behavior, it is often safer to talk to a medical expert. Without qualified diagnosis, depression in adolescents can become serious and could cause harm to the teenager or to others around. Visiting a family doctor and talking about the teenage depression symptoms, the health of the teenager, and any family history of depression can help. When the doctor conducts the examination, he or she will test for signs of depression.

• Further medical help: A family doctor can either recommend a psychologist or psychiatrist if there are no health issues that are causing the teenage depression symptoms. Talking to a mental health expert who specializes in treating children and teenagers is likely to help. Make sure you listen to your child’s opinion about the expert. If the child is not comfortable talking to the expert, the visits are not likely to help.

• Medication: Medication of depressed teens should be only undertaken on professional advice after other methods have been tried. Discuss the side effects of medication on a teenage body and opt for the one that best suits your child’s needs. Medication may give immediate relief from teenage depression symptoms but the damage may be long-lasting.

How to Stop Bad Habits

• Let them grow out of it naturally: Many child bad habits are part of growing up. As children grow and interact with more people, they may not like being laughed at for those habits, or they may want to be like the others, leading them to stop bad habits on their own. Ignoring a habit often denies them of the attention they are seeking by doing it, and they will stop.

• Understand the reasons for the child bad habit: Children often repeat bad habits when upset, scared, sleepy, or insecure. Identifying the feelings that lead to this bad behavior can help you treat the emotions, so they don’t resort to the habit.

• Start in small steps: If your child has a number of habits that you want them to stop, pick the most annoying or harmful habits first and work on those. Trying to break bad habits at one time is bound to make the child feel inadequate and harassed.

• Allow some control: Some child bad habits are developed when children feel that they have no control on anything in their lives. They use these habits to prove that they can do what they want, even if their parents don’t like it. Forcing them to stop bad habits only worsens this problem. Instead, offer them choices and responsibilities that make them feel in control. Letting them decide on what to wear, what to eat or drink, and what they would like to do in their play time can allow them to feel in charge of their lives. This does not mean not providing any guidance; offering them a choice between two alternatives, ‘milk or juice’, ‘red socks or blue’, ‘paint or draw’, is good enough for young children.

• Do not overreact: Some child bad habits are used only for the shock value. Acting shocked or surprised when a child does something like picking their noses or touching themselves in public will be amusing and make them repeat it. Try telling them in a normal or bored voice instead that people don’t like to see it, and they may do it in the bathroom if they wish but not in public. These tactics are much less fun for children and will lead to breaking bad habits.

• Talk to your child about the habit: Explaining to a child that they are putting germs into their mouth or nose can be deterrent enough to children sometimes. If the child bad habit springs from a physical or medical condition, such as an itchy nose, dry cuticles that snag on clothes, or itchy genitals, treating the symptoms can help reduce and eventually break the bad habit.

• Positive reinforcement: When a child stops a bad habit, praising them or rewarding them always works. Try making a chart with pictures that mark each day that passes without the child biting nails or picking their nose. Set a target for the child to achieve, with a reward at the end of it. And make sure you follow through on the reward. Avoid offering candies or other unhealthy treats as rewards: the most positive rewards are activities that the children enjoy, such as trips to the zoo, or being allowed to look at childhood albums.

It is important not to try to break a bad habit during a time of stress or sorrow for children. Most child bad habits provide an element of comfort or self-soothing for the child, and should be allowed to pass unnoticed during this time.

Teens with Depression

Depression in adolescents is caused by a combination of factors. It could be a physical cause, such as the hormone spurt that the teen is experiencing, as well as the stressful process of physical and emotional maturation. It could also be a situational cause, triggered by events or feelings from the environment or life that the teen is experiencing. Family conflict, struggles with parents to assert oneself, break-ups or sexual misadventures, failure at school or feelings of being isolated, or death of a friend or loves one can all cause teenage depression symptoms. Depression in adolescents is treatable, but in some cases can continue into adult years.

Risk Factors for Depression in Adolescents

• Children from broken homes due to death or divorce
• Care giving that is irregular or negative
• Victims of physical or sexual child abuse
• Children with a family history of depression
• Inability to interact socially
• Adolescents with low self-esteem or self-loathing
• Adolescents with negative body image
• Teens who indulge in substance abuse

Recognizing Teenage Depression Symptoms

While girls are more susceptible to teenage depression symptoms than boys, the concern is that depression in adolescents is hard to diagnose. Most parents or caregivers assume that ‘teenagers are just being teenagers’ when they display signs such as irritability, anger, withdrawal from family, sleeping late in the mornings and staying up late at night. However, as an alert parent or caregiver, distinguishing between teens with depression and normal teenagers on a bad day can make all the difference.

• Changes in behavior: Changes in sleeping patterns, daytime sleepiness, and loss or increase of appetite can be teenage depression symptoms. Other behavior such as missing school, shoplifting, indulging in criminal activity, or deliberately defying instructions can indicate depression.
• Mood swings: Teens with depression will seem irritable, will often cry for no apparent reason, will be more forgetful than normal, and may even have problems concentrating or making decisions.
• Social signs: Depression in adolescents often causes them to withdraw from family members and sometimes friends, choosing to spend time with a different set of peers or only one friend. They become less interested in activities, especially family activities, and could spend a lot of time alone.
• Self-image: Depression is caused by or could result in a low sense of self-esteem, as well as feelings of worthlessness. Teens with depression often say things like “What’s the point of it all?” or “It makes no difference”.
• Thoughts of death: Depression in adolescents can sometimes lead to thoughts of suicide or homicide. It could also lead teenagers to worry about death of their family or loved ones. This is one of the most serious teenage depression symptoms and should not be ignored.

Normal Behavior & Teenage Depression: Knowing the Difference

Deciding if teenage depression symptoms are normal teenage behavior or medical symptoms is difficult because it is also the natural behavioral tendencies of adolescents around the world. However, it pays to ask the following questions to decide if your child or ward suffers from depression in adolescents.

• Does this behavior differ greatly from the norm?
• How long has this been going on?
• How severe are the symptoms?
• Are there any signs of substance abuse?
• Are there signs of eating disorders?
• Are there signs of self-injury (cutting, burning, hair pulling)?

Adolescents with long-lasting behavior that is a dramatic change from the usual behavior are likely to be depressed. Complaints of headaches and stomach aches are also a common sign, especially if there is no medical or physical reason for the ailment.

References:

1. Depression in Children & Adolescents – National Institute of Mental Health
2. Adolescent Depression – University of Maryland Medical Center

Common Child Bad Habits

• Nose picking: Parents find this child bad habit one of the most annoying mostly because of the risk of transmitting germs, and also because it is socially frowned upon. It could begin because of encrusting inside the nose due to a cold, and then become a habit. When children pick their nose and put their fingers in their mouth or eyes, or touch other children, infections can be passed on. Dirty or sharp fingernails can irritate the sensitive lining of the nose and create bleeding or oozing cuts inside the nose.

• Sucking thumbs and fingers: Children indulge in sucking their thumbs and fingers when they need comfort. While most outgrow this form of child bad behavior, it can last for some others till past five years of age. This habit should be discouraged because it can cause teeth to grow unevenly or create speech defects. The child bad habit can extend from thumbs or fingers to objects like pacifiers, blankets, or favorite toys.

• Teeth grinding: Bruxism, or grinding teeth is a common child bad habit. Usually infants grind or clench their teeth when milk or permanent teeth are pushing through the gums or in their sleep. Children who grind their teeth at other times are likely to let this develop into a bad habit. This form of child bad behavior can cause defects in the teeth or in the jaw joints and should be stopped.

• Nail biting: Biting nails could be caused by many factors, but the concern is that dirt and bacteria lodged under nails is transferred directly into the mouth through this child bad behavior. It could also lead to infected or bleeding cuticles that are very painful. Some of the same methods used to stop the bad habit of thumb sucking can be used to stop nail biting – using bitter liquid on fingernails, distracting the child when he or she is biting nails, and providing an activity to keep hands busy.

• Holding breath: Children hold their breath because sometimes they feel it is the only thing they can control. It could carry on for enough time that they lose consciousness. This child bad behavior can be the most frightening for parents. It is best to consult a doctor when this happens, to rule out medical complications that have caused this.

• Touching genitals or masturbation: Children explore all parts of their bodies and are fascinated by their own discoveries. It is a natural urge to explore their own genitalia as much as exploring their own hands and face. When children explore their genitals it gives them pleasure, causing them to repeat the child bad habit again. They do not realize the sexual connotations of this behavior but can cause a great deal of embarrassment to the parents.

Children enjoy any kind of attention and if a bad habit brings them parental attention even in the form of reprimand, they will repeat this child bad habit. It takes patience, understanding and creativity to help a child give up a bad habit.

References:

1. Bad Habits/ Annoying Behavior – University of Michigan Health System
2. Hair Pulling, Head Banging and Other Bad Habits – Keep Kids Healthy

How Do SIDS Deaths Occur?

Infant cot death can cause the death of even a healthy baby which makes SIDS deaths almost impossible to predict. When a death occurs, it is only when illness, birth defects, parental negligence, and genetic disorder have been ruled out as a cause that it will be ascribed to SIDS. Infants who have succumbed to SIDS deaths show no signs of suffering, but a true SIDS-related death could be due to a combination of factors.

Risk of SIDS

Studies show the following characteristics or features lead to higher risk of SIDS:

• Babies between 2-4 months old are the most common victims, but the first six months have a high risk of SIDS
• SIDS deaths are most frequent during colder months
• African-American babies twice as likely to die of SIDS
• Babies of Native American origin are three times as likely to die of SIDS
• Male infants are more vulnerable to risk of SIDS than female infants
• Addiction to or use of drugs, alcohol or nicotine during pregnancy
• Inadequate prenatal care can increase the risk of SIDS
• Teenage pregnancies and mothers under the age of 20
• Premature or low weight babies are more susceptible to infant cot death
• Exposure to cigarette smoke after birth can lead to SIDS death
• Babies who are covered or overdressed could overheat while sleeping, leading to SIDS death
• Babies who are put to sleep on their stomach or side could succumb to infant cot death as it hampers breathing

Parenting Tips for Preventing SIDS

• Pregnancy care: During pregnancy, fetuses that are exposed to nicotine, alcohol, or drugs are more likely to succumb to SIDS deaths. Expectant mothers should ensure regular prenatal check-ups are performed at the right time.
• New born infants: Breast feeding has lately shown to be effective in preventing SIDS. Ensure that babies are kept in smoke-free atmospheres.

Sleeping Habits to Reduce the Risk of SIDS:

• Ensuring safe sleeping habits for babies is the most effective way to reduce risk of SIDS.
• Use firm mattresses for babies to sleep on. Do not use water beds, beanbags, sofas or fleece and lambskin.
• Avoid placing stuffed toys and pillows in the cribs or bassinets of infants.
• The most important precaution against SIDS deaths is to place babies on their backs to sleep. This keeps airways and breathing patterns open and unobstructed. If babies have reflux problems or parents are worried they may choke on milk, vomit or other substances, it is best to talk to the family doctor.
• Babies should be placed in a separate crib or bassinet to sleep, but if possible kept in the parents’ room so that you are always close at hand. This significantly reduces the risk of SIDS deaths.
• Once babies can roll over both onto their sides and stomachs, it is acceptable to allow them to choose their own sleeping position. This is usually possible for babies during their 5-7^th months.
• Keep the room in which the baby is sleeping at a pleasant temperature. A temperature that is comfortable for an adult in a short sleeved shirt is the right temperature for babies. This is usually around 16-20 degrees Celsius.
• Babies do not need to be covered by blankets during the first 6 months, but if used, a blanket should be tucked under the mattress at the bottom of the bed so that it cannot move above the baby’s shoulders.
• Studies show that pacifiers can help reduce the risk of SIDS. Babies who are comfortable using a pacifier can be laid to sleep with one in their mouths. There is no need to replace it if it falls out during sleep.

While all the precautions are important, also ensure that any caretakers or family members who may interact with the baby are aware of these guidelines to prevent SIDS. Keeping regular appointments for well baby check-ups are important as well.

References:

1. Preventing Cot Death – Baby and Pregnancy
2. Sudden Infant Death Syndrome – Kids Health
3. Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDC) – Mayo Clinic

To make sure that you are able to guide them through the turbulent phase of puberty problems, you have to establish an open, sensitive communication style with them. Handling children who are going through puberty is a delicate task. Most teens pretend they know everything, and cover up insecurity or embarrassment with a cocky or defensive exterior. Parents will have to find ways to communicate puberty information without hurting feelings or without the child feeling like he or she has no privacy.

Puberty Problems and Emotions

While all adults know the changes they went through during puberty, it is a good idea to go through a few books or do some research online. This not only helps to refresh adult memories about teenage worries or concerns, it also provides ways to discuss puberty information. For single parents who need to have the puberty talk with their child of the opposite sex, this is vital to understanding their puberty problems.

Most children experiencing puberty problems are embarrassed about the physical changes. Girls with developing breasts or boys with voices that are breaking are likely to be teased by their peer groups, especially if they are amongst the earliest to develop. The growth of pubic hair or beards can cause shame or shyness too. Teens with acne, excessive perspiration or oily skin or hair could be embarrassed by the changes.

Communicating Puberty Information

• Having the puberty talk with your child, regardless of age, should be during a time when the child is free from distraction and stress. For many children, discussing awkward issues while performing a repetitive task such as peeling potatoes or washing dishes makes it easier as they don’t have to look directly at the parent or caregiver.
• Start off with a brief discussion of the puberty information, just touching upon all points. Children will want to think about facts they learn and come back later to discuss them further.
• Encourage children to talk about themselves, instead of immediately telling them what they should expect. No child experiences puberty problems exactly the same way, even within the same family, and they will have questions or concerns of their own.
• In addition to talking to children, provide reading material for them to go through. Keeping a few books with puberty information in the child’s bedroom can take care of the questions that your child is curious about but is afraid to ask.

It is also important that parents provide some puberty information about the changes happening to the opposite sex. Teenagers are naturally curious about the changes within themselves and others, as well as sexually curious. Explaining puberty information to your child can help your child become more aware, more sensitive, and more cautious.

Reference:

1. Puberty – Keep Kids Healthy

Stay at home fathers have not always been easily accepted in society and most SAHDs today find that this attitude is still evident, especially in some cultures. When men become fathers at home, they are challenging gender-based stereotypes which have existed for centuries, and this can make some people uncomfortable. The debate over whether men can perform the daily upbringing duties for children as well as women is being laid to rest. While their parenting styles may be different from women, fathers at home are showing society that they are sensitive, responsible and nurturing caregivers.

Deciding to Become a Stay at Home Father

Before taking the plunge, remember that going from a full working week to a full-time father at home is not as easy as handing in your papers. Stay at home fathers have to be prepared to put up with barbs and jokes at their expense, from family, friends and society. On the other hand, there is a sense of fulfilment and achievement from rearing your children right and watching them grow and learn.

Discuss the move with your partner, keeping in mind any financial constraints that may arise from the loss of your salary. Budgeting for one partner to stay home is vital and avoids unforeseen problems cropping up later. Count the money saved by a father at home as well – expenses on child care, day care, taking the children to and fro all add up, and money saved is money earned.

For anyone, man or woman, moving from the buzz of a professional life to a life at home can be a drastic lifestyle change. It also means that you will spend more time with children and talking about cartoons, story books, toys and school days. Make sure you take the time out for yourself to meet and interact with other adults, and pursue your own interests. Search for support groups for stay at home fathers, either online or in your locality. Most groups will provide benefits other than socialization, such as baby sitting, tips on child care, outings and picnics and other events.

Tips for Stay at Home Fathers

Being a SAHD is a rewarding and fulfilling job, but it also means putting the interests and needs of your children before yours. Here are some tips to make it easier, and to help you make the most of the time you spend with your children:

• Taking kids out doesn’t mean you have to supervise them all the time. Sometimes you just need to find the right places: swimming pools with kiddy hours, indoor play areas and gyms for toddlers, children’s parks, reading sessions in your local library, playgroups that are supervised by other parents – all these are good options for you to sit back and watch your kids have fun while you relax.
• Teaching children through learning games is always a constructive way to spend time together. Even tasks like going shopping, cleaning up the house and making dinner can be learning activities if you approach them creatively. Allow children to participate in these tasks, and divide responsibilities according to their age.
• Creating a routine for children, especially young children, adds a sense of stability and helps them learn what you expect from them. While you don’t have to stick to it by the minute, keeping a regular time for bedtimes, school mornings and meals provides a structure and timetable for both you and your children.
• Make sure you keep up-to-date with the developments in your profession as far as possible. If you plan to rejoin the workforce when the children are older, it’ll be important. Take classes to keep skills updated, and if you are considering a career change, this is a good time to do your homework.

More than anything else, remember that you can’t take care of your children if you don’t take care of yourself. Take time to do the things you love and enjoy, and you’ll come back feeling refreshed and ready to be a full-time stay-at-home dad.

References:

1. Stay-at-Home Dads Forge New Identities, Roles – Washington Post
2. Parenting Tips: Stay at home fathers – eSsortment